Let’s just say her “explosive” experience was similar to mine. add more water if needed. Hysterical! amzn_assoc_ad_type = "smart"; ‘Cause Doritos, while delicious, sound like just the right component to make a bag of apricots go Super Saiyan in your asshole. . That thought never enters your mind when you’re eating apricots on account of them tasting so fuckin’ plain. Contact your GP immediately if you or your child develop any symptoms of dehydration. Dried apricots are a type of traditional dried fruit.When treated with sulfur dioxide (E220), the color is vivid orange. What Are The Side Effects Of Prunes? Now its about an hour later and im sitting on the toilet simultaneously shitting and laughing my ass off (literally), I am experiencing the exact same situation. It’s really easy to OD on dried apricots because eating, say, 5 of them doesn’t feel like eating all that much, but it’s the same as eating 5 whole apricots (which most people would consider a serious pigout) and therefore has the same effect on your GI tract (it’s also worth noting that it also involves consuming the same amount of sugar).. If only I’d seen this post *before* buying a bag of dried apricots as a ‘healthy’ snack for work and eating about five in one sitting… LOL. If only I had known sooner. I googled apricots and constipation and the first thing that popped up was your blog. I fear that the laughter will cause loss of bowel control…. A bunch of energy behind a [mostly liquid] projectile, and BAM! If this happens to you, try … Farted loudly at work today because of these. WARNING: Listen to this HUGE dried apricot fart if you dare! Honestly, I made out okay. I love apricots. Like most posters, this info came a little too late for me (five hours later my guts are still carrying on). Explosive diarrhea is usually short-lived. I don’t think she had a reason to sabotage my digestive system, but who knows! 2. You are an excellent writer! Even though they are dried and easy to eat, you are essentially eating an entire apricot. Have you ever had diarrhea while looking very attractive or does it come when you haven't fixed hair and make up? Apart from being used as a laxative, prunes are also used in several sweet and savory dishes like stewed prune, compote tzimmes, North African tagines, puddings (Nordic prune kisel), soups cakes and sugar plums and stuffing. You go about you day, thinking everything’s fine, and then out of nowhere, you feel a tremor in the force. Let me be clear. container of dried apricots and went to watch the football game at a friend’s house. Reply. This piece was so fucking funny- I HAD to read it from the throne because I can’t be trusted to laugh with my pants on right now. I ate an entire bag of dried apricots. And technically, wouldn’t they be called “plunes”? Many dried fruits are preserved with sulfites or sulfur dioxide, which prevents discoloration and growth of mold and other microorganisms. amzn_assoc_default_search_phrase = "gaming pc"; Dried fruit is also dense in fiber which really gets things moving. BIG mistake. It also contain 1,171 IU of vitamin A and 1.4 mg of vitamin E. Furthermore, it contain 3 mg of sodium per serving. If possible, make sure that the person gets some exercise each day, such as walking. It’s one of those fruits that no one really goes out of their way to get a hold of. This post is so fucking hilarious. Also they stank bad…..I mean really, really bad! I was farting like mad for 2 days, an the stench was so bad I had to air my room for 3 days after that. Nonsulfited dried fruit: looks like shoe leather, but very tasty, and probably healthier. The hardest part is we were under staffed so there was no way I could leave my register. Poor toilet… never saw it coming. OMG! The moment you get your pants down, pray to God you’re wearing a helmet, ’cause the explosive force of your anus expelling untold volumes of apricot juice is going to put you in orbit, or failing that; head first into whatever roof lie above you. I even managed to laugh very hard at your post. FML! I have not laughed so hard in all my life! 05 December, 2018 . As I sit here in terrific pain from losing all of my fluids, I take solace in the fact that I’m not the only one. Apricots are an excellent fruit to be included in your diet if you consider losing weight. The insoluble fiber in prunes can cause or worsen diarrhea. That is equal to one serve of fruit ... is a delectable combination of dried fruits, nuts, spices, honey and, if you are lucky, chocolate. Stomach bloating can be caused by eating too many dried fruits, according to an expert. I just read this article after trying and trying to figure out what the hell just made me feel like I was giving birth out of my ass the other day. Massive dried apricot induced fart (Loudest Fart Ever)! Funniest thing I’ve read in a while. It got so bad that I googled it and ended up here. Yes 16. The immense pressure generated by the expulsion process is enough to cripple a man for life. have to portion control going forward…. amzn_assoc_region = "US"; My wife made me sleep on the couch as I was literally farting every 30 seconds once I was finally “done” with the throne. I’m typing this after having been woken at 2am by intestinal cramps like I haven’t had since before realising that I’m lactose intolerant. it was the apricots… i will spare you the details of what i went through, but its nice to know i will never eat them again,. I had a handful of dried apricots at lunch today and have been farting nonstop. Male or female, young or old, eat too many and they will wreak havoc on your digestive system. But they also contain fiber, and consuming them in moderation may help with your weight loss plans. Funny Stuff! Whether it be fire safety or monitoring the health of ones’ bowels, knowing is half the battle! I love dried cots. sugar, mascarpone, vanilla bean, pie dough, fresh mint leaves and 3 more . Thanks again for the humorous and perfectly detailed story. Normally dried apricots do not contain any added sugar with low glycemic index. I had one, was really tasty. This evening I over-indulged in the dried variety and I’m completely paying for it. Male or female, young or old, eat too many and they will wreak havoc on your digestive system. Classic. Michelle says. amzn_assoc_ad_mode = "search"; Six dried apricots (40 grams) contain about 10 grams of total fiber . Could he be allergic or did he have to many A: Yes, dried apricots are a laxative – similar to dried prunes. Hey. Consider this a public service announcement and consider yourself warned. And yes, they were apricots, not any other type of fruit that looks like one. Did this for about 2hrs (and 11 times-wish I was kidding). You can thank me later! It was like a gun shooting out a bullet. Could this have been the cause since i have read that dried fruit has this affect - if so how much longer will it last since i have had it 4 days? Organic dried apricots appear brown and withered (which is how they should look) as opposed to the bright orange of the conventional variety. Ready to fart more than you thought was humanly possible? Diarrhea. And the worst part, I did it again, cause they are just too good. So watch out for diarrhea and make sure you are close to a bathroom! Do dried apricots cause diarrhea? I will never consume this fruit again! The right way of eating. persistent diarrhea ; unexplained weight loss ; blood in the stool; These symptoms could indicate an underlying condition. i ate dried bananas apples kiwi and mango, how can that cause diarrhea. They tasted so good and I was switching off eating them with Doritos- sweet and salty, chewy/crunchy -pregnant lady bliss!! These were not normal farts. Yes I have and its both ways. They normally do not have any sugar added and have a low glycemic indexC. Just brought 5 apricots with me to work. One big downside to eating fruit as a cure for this condition is the high fructose content, which is well known to cause upset stomach and diarrhea. I thought I was being smart by avoiding the dried version. Anyway…thanks God I’m not actually dying. 8 Minute Clip of Women Farting and Burping on TikTok, The Gassiest Food Ever in the History of the Entire World, Female Cast Members from The Mandalorian That Have Admitted to Farting, TikTok = FartTok: Another Women Farting and Burping Compilation. Seriously, you better make sure to be holding on tight to the toilet too, ’cause in about 1 second flat, you’re gonna’ be floating 20 feet above it spewing a hateful waterfall of orange fecal matter onto the floor, the walls, all over yourself and most of the nearby countryside. You sir and/or madam, are a riot. When you eat dried fruits, you also have to drink more water. Now I know. Figured it was healthier than chips, right. Ahahahahaha! Ended up eating a third of the bag….that’s 333 grams. Thanks for the laughs . Promotes Healthy Digestion. OMG I had the WORST FARTS EVER at work today from eating about 30 dried apricots. Thanks for making this post because you have accurately described my night….I ate too many apricots obviously and was beginning to want to go to the ER it has been so bad but reading this while on the porceline thrown calmed my nerves and made me feel less alone. Fruit juice or fizzy drinks should be avoided as they can make diarrhoea worse in children. Thank you. I’ll find out tonight, I guess! Excess Consumption of Dried Plums or Prunes May Cause Diarrhea: Dried plums or prunes may cause diarrhea. I’ve been farting non stop today and thought I was dying. No, I’m afraid you have not sir and/or madam, not until you’ve OD’ed on apricots. The last thing you want to do is go out and start stuffing yourself with fruit to try to put an end to the diarrhea… It is all about moderation and eating too much of just about anything can cause digestive issues like diarrhea. One cup (165 grams) of sliced apricots provides 3.3 grams of fiber, which is 8.6% and 13.2% of the DV for men and women, respectively ().Apricots … i actually got scared, what the fuck is going on?! Fuckin’ Aplets and Cotlets…. I’ve just consumed 40+ (dried apricots are very addictive) I can’t wait for a gooooood shit! God. Many people have dietary fructose intolerance and this condition may lead to painful … Lesson learned – from now on when I enjoy my apricots I make sure my next 12 hours are commitment free. Concealable Weapons You're Not Cool Enough To Carry, a short list of foods that are known to upset my stomach, http://thehillsidecircus.wordpress.com/2009/03/11/ballad-of-the-butt-bullets/, Ava Waits, Holistic Health and Nutrition Counselor, Maxboxing.com – The Ultimate Boxing Experience. Have mercy! So you fed your son 10 apricots at once, which is a huge fibre attack on the colon. Let’s just say her “explosive” experience was similar to mine. But last night’s splurge on the seasons first crop has me belching from my butt every few minutes. Not long ago, I put together a short list of foods that are known to upset my stomach. I ask you, how else could you describe a fruit that looks like the fuckin’ juiciest peach you’ve ever seen, tastes like grapefruit smeared with dirt and sea monkeys, and then yanks your colon out your ass an hour later? A big carton too. I really feel bad for you, that you have not had any really good apricots. I remember when I was 17 waiting for my 4 hour shift to start as a cashier at target, when I bought about 100g of dried apricots to munch on before my shift. I ate a bag of dried apricots before going out for a hike/bike. Oh god…why didn’t I read this sooner. They may cause a headache and diarrhea. Damn! Eating even one apricot gives me the most painful explosive diarrhea possible. Although fruits can supply a significant amount of water, you should not eat any kind of fruit when you have diarrhea. I’ve found out that cut, prepared fresh fruits (including pineapple) from the supermarkets can cause diarrhea sometimes. Assuming you find your way to a toilet/honey bucket/spot in the bushes, congratulations; you now get the pleasure of enduring one of the most savage tests of rectal fortitude known to man. Thank you for writing this. Being rich in iron, an adequate intake of dried apricots could help in the … Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind ripping the occasional large fart since it feels good to relieve the pressure but the gas created by dried apricots is absolutely ridiculous. Things were going ok for the first 2 hours, but the last two hours were the worst. I just ate a whole bag from Sprouts and was sitting here wondering why the heck I’m farting like I ate an entire plate of baked ziti. My coworker who sat in the cubicle behind me offered me a bag one afternoon at work. Because dried fruit is an energy dense food, it’s easy to over-consume these sweet treats. Even though they are dried and easy to eat, you are essentially eating an entire apricot. You just kind of eat ’cause, well; it’s there and you have nothing better to do. No pectin is required and the jam is ready in 35 minutes. Maybe I’m the crazy one but dried apricots taste so good that the farts are a small price to pay for this delicious healthy snack! I ate a whole pack of dried fruit on monday and since then have suffered from chronic diarrhea. I’ve been farting mercilessly since enjoying half a bag of dried apricots. Hahaha, what an unfortunate and hilarious account of food revenge! dried apricots, ground cinnamon, kamut, vegetable oil, light agave nectar and 3 more. Change ), You are commenting using your Google account. amzn_assoc_region = "US"; Remember dried apricots don’t discriminate. They will fuck with you right back, and trust me; you don’t want that…, Filed under: Comics, Movies, Uncategorized, anal, anus, apricot, bowels, Calvin and Hobbes, corn snake, diarrhea, feces, health, Jurassic Park, king snake, OD, poop, PSA, stomach, T-Rex, Turkey, Turks, Tyrannosaurus Rex, upset stomach, Zoobooks, Aplets and Cotlets? I was farting so bad that I felt sorry for my fellow passengers. “Having large amounts of the sweetener sorbitol, which is found in dried … These were super loud and felt like they would tear my anus a new hole if you know what I mean. Then I tried honey/fruit (banana only) for the first time since I stopped them in the summer, and I started feeling sick again, with increased bowel movements and diarrhea. Do dried apricots cause diarrhea n vomiting and a swollen belly? My question is – do you mind if I re blog this? the only other thing i can think of is food poisoning since no else around me is sick it seems unlikely to be a bug. Dried-Apricots-3. Female Cast Members from The Mandalorian That Have... TikTok = FartTok: Another Women Farting and Burping... Former Model Katie Price Can’t Stop Farting, BREAKING NEWS! Some of these were 5-10 seconds long. Dried-Apricots-7 . Googled farting and apricots and found myself here. The gas was so bad that I had to throw away the jeans I was wearing during that night AND I had to get rid of a cushioned chair that I had been sitting and farting in for hours that night. I am mainly a fruit water by day but I simply had no idea the extent. So wish I had found this a few hours ago BEFORE consuming half a box of turkish apricots from Sprouts. Avoid these negative effects by keeping your dried fruit intake to a small amount each day or split your portion into two separate servings. amzn_assoc_title = "Today's Amazon Video Game Deals"; If we can spare even one more person from this experience it will be well worth it. Apricot balls made with dried apricots, condensed milk, coconut and brown sugar By Diane Bell. Perhaps you mean CORAL snake? 1 doctor answer. My bad. She said she didn’t like them and that I could have them. amzn_assoc_default_search_phrase = "playstation games"; Oddly, this gas is far worse than what I’ve experienced from an entire box of raisins. While the U.S. National Library of Medicine does not consider sulfur dioxide to be harmful for healthy people to consume in small amounts, according to Food Matter… Adequate consumption of dried apricots is known to reduce the acidity of the stomach. Share your story below in the comments! More about the side effects are listed below. Ethnic foods based on dried apricots include qubani ka meetha in India and chamoy in Mexico. Looked it up and was really happy to find this. Dried apricots give me the worst gas of all time. amzn_assoc_region = "US"; Looking for more foods that will make you fart uncontrollably? If only I could Marty McFly back and slap my innocent self who casually put those apricots in my shopping cart. Dried apricots are tasty right out of the packet. amzn_assoc_default_category = "All"; Change ), You are commenting using your Twitter account. I am going through this hell as we speak!! Dried fruit certainly sounds like a great idea—it's got the word "fruit" in it!—but it's also on our list of "healthy" habits that can make you gain weight. Then yesterday, I had the same type of thing happen. Erin Brown says: May 4, 2015 at 7:05 AM. Dried fruits: dried prunes, raisins, dates, figs, apricots, and etc. No man should have to suffer the indignity that we did. Their rich to the point in which you tell yourself at some point while eating them: “Well, I’ve been eating mango now for 20 minutes straight. Despite this, the brightly colored, supple fuzzy skinned apricot was seemingly engineered in such a way as to lure foolish creatures into eating it. Some of them were so bad I surprised and disgusted myself. Prunes belong to the plum family and are sold mostly as dried fruits. the only other thing i can think of is food poisoning since no else around me is sick it seems unlikely to be a bug. Dried fruits; Caffeine. I’m glad I’m not alone. I will def. Glad I found this site. If I leave work and have to hurl my shitstink at home, I will be a bit disappointed. You have just described my actual post Apricot indulgent day not least I’m still post effects. Moderation is 2-3 per DAY. Your blog was shared with select members of our office staff as an emergency evacuation report came in from one or our staff on the road following the consumption of “many” apricots. Seriously, me and those 2, we fight it out all the fuckin’ time, ‘cept now that I’ve seen all their best moves, they ain’t got nothin’ on me. Now I know: Dried fruit (such as apricots and prunes) are no good. I ate a whole pack of dried fruit on monday and since then have suffered from chronic diarrhea. Got up to wash hands and had to immediately sit down on the throne again. By the end of the story, I was laughing hysterically and put the apricots away. Normally there are several nutrient inside the fruit. 34 years experience Pediatrics. If you're breastfeeding or bottle feeding your baby and they have diarrhoea, you should continue to feed them as normal. This is because sulfites have been added to preserve the apricot’s color. I then proceeded to rip the loudest rancid farts ever for the next several hours. Call the doctor if you notice a change in the person's bowel habits. Dried apricots contain a sugar alcohol called sorbitol that is hard to digest and can make you incredibly gassy. Dried-Apricots-8. The one and only destiny everyone has to face from eating too much apricots : a symphony in the bathroom. Most dried apricots also contain sulfur dioxide which give them their bright orange color but can also wreak havoc on your digestive system and create massive amounts of gas. I have a section “Poop Stories” on my blog and this is great! I had a few too many dried apricots. Many dried fruits are preserved with sulfites or sulfur dioxide, which prevents discoloration and growth of mold and other microorganisms. Not even one. There’s a reason why I don’t eat gluten. A mold allergy from eating dried fruit is not caused by a digestive complication but rather an overreaction of your immune system; your immune system mistakes the mold as a dangerous substance and attacks it. Best description, best accurate rant on apricots I wish you’d be a comedian! It is perfect for using up dried apricots you have on hand or to make as a special gift for Christmas, Mother's Day or a birthday. Due to their high fiber-to-volume ratio, they are sometimes used to relieve constipation or induce diarrhea. I thought to myself these are delicious so I decided to have a few more. One big downside to eating fruit as a cure for this condition is the high fructose content, which is well known to cause upset stomach and diarrhea. Dried fruits: dried prunes, raisins, dates, figs, apricots, and etc. Vitamin A promotes good vision, making apricots beneficial for eyesight support. I mean. Between the gas pains and a severely tweaked back from lifting a large TV, I may call 9-11! That being said, as I went over that list in my head today, I came to realize that I accidentally left out one particular food item that no bowel-wrecking food list should be without. It starts small, like the water glass ripples in Jurassic Park. I farted for hours. The worst part for me was that it was even more delayed than an hour. I could not think what I ate differently that day…. may cause or exacerbate diarrhea. Dried apricots are a type of traditional dried fruit.When treated with sulfur dioxide (E220), the color is vivid orange. 4. amzn_assoc_title = "Gas Relief"; Thanks  to the high fiber ratio, dried apricots can also have quite the laxative effect. My. I feel a soft rumble, yet, nothing to the threatcon level that you purport. Which also had kale in it. I’ve emailed your article to absolutely everyone I know along with my story. At this point there is precious little time, possibly less than 5 minutes before either your entire body tears itself in half in a desperate bid to pass an ungodly mass of shit in one go, or you start puking up orange feces. Actually, corn snakes are not venomous at all. Answered on Nov 15, 2020. I, too, am writing this from the bathroom, where I’ve spent a good portion of my afternoon after innocently going to the grocery store and picking up some dried apricots. I’ve popped my ears anally aborting a gelatinous apricot baby once or twice. I bought a kilogram of Dried Apricots at the local market. Its high fiber to volume ratio helps to provide relief from constipation and promote diarrhea. Diarrhea. Frikking hilarious!!! ?” (I haven’t felt this way since before I found out I couldn’t eat gluten. During this time, it is best to consume bland foods and plenty of water, to prevent dehydration. ( Log Out /  Reply. Dried apricots normally do not have any sugar added and have a low glycemic index. Blood clotting. amzn_assoc_linkid = "5e3c59618e744023afc462dc93404d9b"; If you need to boost your fiber intake, slowly increase it over a period of several weeks. Won’t be buying dried apricots anymore!! amzn_assoc_tracking_id = "fhub05-20"; amzn_assoc_tracking_id = "fhub05-20"; Reply. Keep Clean. Somehow I still managed to teach this afternoon, in-between violent attacks from the apricots. Avoid these negative effects by keeping your dried fruit intake to a small amount each day or split your portion into two separate servings. amzn_assoc_search_bar = "true"; The point is, that list was only a small sampling of the many food products out there (mainly dried fruits and dairy products) that, while delicious; have severely debilitating repercussions for those that choose to consume them. I’m in so much pain and I’m losing all of my fluids, yet I’m still laughing out loud at this post. I should probably pack it in, otherwise I’ll get the shits.”. Haha! You, sir, have had some really bad apricots then. He has always occasionally had a bad poo/red bottom but I hadn't connected the two until Dried-Apricots-4. No, I’m afraid you have not sir and/or madam. Everyone needs to be warned of the dangers of eating this evil fruit! If I survive this never again! Dried-Apricots-5. amzn_assoc_linkid = "2aef91cc3686444a5cd36cedf36568c7"; (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); amzn_assoc_placement = "adunit0"; 34 years experience Pediatrics. A couple of dried apricots in combination with other ingredients will accelerate the recovery of the body in case of gastrointestinal disorders. Dried Fruit. Dried apricots are rich in vital nutrients. No one wanted any so before I knew it, I consumed the ENTIRE box along with sausage, chips & dip and 3 beers! At l. Good greif! Well thank you very much. Let’s just say I can’t stop farting after eating a bag of dried apricots earlier today. Food, it is now legendary in my diet was the worst gas my! Risk doing it again, cause they are just too good s to... Smelly facts and apricots it ’ s very lethal and can clear a room in no.... You can Imagine, 7 Minute Compilation of Women farting and Burping on TikTok out that cut prepared... 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